What is really real?
- Danielle Federico
- May 13
- 4 min read
We are in constant states of transformation. Every day is a new opportunity to do better, be better and stay true to your path. But let’s be real - it’s not easy to stay consistent with growth and evolution. It takes serious attention and work. It takes commitment.
The world we live in is making it harder for us to think for ourselves and to trust our instincts and to thrive in a way that feels aligned.
Alignment takes intention. It takes being real about what is working and what isn’t.
We often look outside of ourselves for recognition and external validation.
Why?
Because we are human.
We have been conditioned to believe that others are better, prettier, more successful, luckier, and just have it all together, right? The truth? We are all just doing our best. Everyone has a story, a past, a problem to solve. There is absolutely NO ONE who has it all together. Zip. Zero. Zilch.
As someone who has lived a life of transformation, consistently working towards being a better human, helping others, raising a family, even raising myself - I totally get it. I have evolved through so many lives in this one life that some days I don’t recognize myself. It’s in those moments, I realize that there is more to integrate, more to love and more to embrace – to take time to pull back the curtains, re-evaluate and to have zero apologies for the changes that are showing up in my life.
It makes the work that I offer become even more powerful. I have learned to trust the process and to pay attention. On those days when I feel insecure, or self-critical, or lack confidence, I ask myself where that wound is coming from. Who is reflecting my own vulnerability back to me? I cherish those moments. I tuck them away and have learned to be comfortable in the uncomfortable. That is conscious living – to see where you are own patterns are getting in the way of authentic living.
As we grow as people, we discover what is true to ourselves, but really matters. It’s always in the messiness and chaos of life, when I discover something new and exciting. The unfolded laundry in the house, the dishes piling in the sink, the stacks of papers on my desk needing to get filed.
As a woman, a mother, a caretaker, a wife, a business owner, (and more) I do most of the work myself. It takes a village to make a home a home, and to show my children that even while we work towards our achievements of life, we must also allow for imperfection and chaos to show us the magic of creating.
This is REAL LIFE – not some perfect social media video making you feel awful about the way you live. We, as women, as people, as a society have got to start talking about what is really at the core of our anxiety, high cortisol, depression, and to stop looking outside of our lives. The beauty of life is often in the mundane. The living room, strewn with books, and unfolded blankets, while children are laughing and playing. The closets that need to be tended to and weeded through.
The life that YOU are creating.
That is what matters. Don’t be afraid to show up fully – in the messiness of it all. My new saying (this is a recently learned acronym for me) #IRL (In real life, in case you are a Gen X’er like me and didn’t know).
Let’s be real – and I mean, really, really, real. Say it the way it is. Share your thoughts, embrace the chaos of life and make it your own. I know that my job is to help others embrace who they are – in all stages. I can’t do my job if I’m not being honest with my own life. How can we share our stories and relate to others if we aren’t being relatable?
My job is to help you polish the parts that need a bit of shining, while still being true to you. No bullshit, just open, honest reflection that has been tried and true for me as a coach.
22 years of coaching. 22 years of owning a business. 22 years of lived transformation.
Things are changing rapidly in our world. How we show up, heal, feel, look at life. In truth, the conversations in my office are from people who are really struggling but afraid to say so. People who feel the shifts in energy, are empaths, are sensitive people, trying to make it work in a world that makes thriving hard.
For those who are less affected by sensitivity, they are feeling burnout, exhaustion, overwhelm. How do we get ahead of this curve? How do we support each other?
The answer is honesty. Self-reflection. Facing the programs, fears and narratives we have learned and unlearning them.
My business is The Modern Spiritualist – I have owned this name for 17 years. It represents all the parts that make you, you and me, me.
From wisdom, to growth, to mind, body and yes, spirit integration - to authentic beauty, inner and outer confidence...it is the winding path of life that we ebb and flow through to find stillness, wholeness, and self-appreciation. It’s about real life - real strategy. Real results.
Let's get started. There is no time to waste.
Spring rates are still in effect until June 22nd, 2026
Books open May 20th for new sessions. Get in touch here www.themodernspiritualist.com/our-location/contact
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